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Branding Iron Editorial
Donate canned goods to help families in need PDF Print E-mail
Written by Anna Guyton   
Wednesday, 19 November 2008 09:33

Dear Editor,

To recognize National Hunger and Homelessness week, a committed group of students is occupying Simpson’s Plaza this week to collect canned food and other non-perishable food for the local food bank.

We are the founding members of The Good Mule Project – a student initiative you’ll be hearing a lot more about over the next few months. If students are interested in getting involved on campus with issues surrounding social justice and environmental sustainability, they should ask one of us at the table for an application for an upcoming student activist training conference sponsored by TGM.

Many students might be surprised to know that in 2006, 10.6 percent of Wyoming households were food insecure, and 10.3 percent of the population was in poverty. Out of a population of 489,486, that means that at least 17,295 people in this state were food insecure and 50,417 were in poverty. Imagine being in their shoes during long, cold Wyoming winters. Fortunately, there are many easy and inexpensive ways that you can help.

Even if every student only brought two cans to the table this week, we could make sure that every hungry and homeless person in Wyoming has something to eat for their Thanksgiving dinner. Is there anything in the cupboard that you don’t often eat? Are there any care-package goodies you don’t really like?

Even if you don’t have anything at home, you can find many canned foods and non-perishable foods like tuna, canned vegetables, tomato sauces, “PastaRoni,” and “Rice-a-Roni” for less than a dollar. Pick up a couple extra things while you’re at the store this week to help give someone a nice holiday dinner. I don’t know of any student that would want to perpetuate the hunger and homelessness we have in our state and in our country, so please do something about it, and spread the word about our canned food drive this week. Thank you on behalf of every life you’ll be making better.

Sincerely,

Anna Guyton

The Good Mule Project 

 
Banks and business and bear markets, oh my! PDF Print E-mail
Written by Wiley Combs   
Wednesday, 19 November 2008 09:29

The credit system is an interesting thing. It is the ultimate epitome of the economic ideal of “unlimited growth.”

Why did the Stock Market Crash of 1929 happen? Most of us learned in U.S. History Class that people were speculating about stocks with money that they did not have. This heavy emphasis on speculation resulted in a market that was largely funded by loans, so much in fact that the $8.5 billion in loaned money amounted to more than the actual amount of currency in circulation.

Of course, the crash occurred because the economic bubble created by this rash of speculation burst unexpectedly. Investors rushed to cash out their speculated stocks, resulting in a nosedive in the New York Stock Exchange, and the worst economic downturn to date. The Glass-Steagall Act, passed in response to the crash, resulting in today’s system of separation between deposit banks and investment banks.

Recently, the last of the large investment banks, JP Morgan, received special dispensation from the federal government to enact an emergency change from their traditional role of investment banking to deposit banking. This change was announced on the same Sunday night that the gigantic bank bailout was first proposed. The bank claimed that the investment-banking model did not work.

As we observe the effects of the trillion-dollar bank bailout and consider the potential impacts of providing the same courtesy to companies like GM, one is forced to ask how similar today’s economic situation is to that of 80 years ago. What did the banks do with the funds they were given? What followed the passage of the bank bailout bill was the most expedient buyout of smaller banks by larger banking companies in this country’s history.

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Ask Dr. No, or: Tuesdays with Queries PDF Print E-mail
Written by Noelle Lopez   
Tuesday, 18 November 2008 09:50

Got a burning question? Send it to Dr. No. Feral ‘til 8 and baptized by fire, Dr. No has been doling out advice and solving problems since 1999. Her areas of expertise include sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll, Wesley Snipes movies and outer space, but she can answer pretty much any question.

Question: 

I’ve kind of been seeing this girl, and I like her a lot, but I hate that she goes out all the time. She never wants to just sit around and do stuff like watch a movie with me. She always wants to go to parties or the bar. Don’t get me wrong, I like to go out too but I really wish she wanted to things that didn’t involve a fifth of whisky. What should I do? 

Answer:

You know, Eddie Murphy used to have the same problem. His girl always wanted to party all the time, party all the time, party all the tiiiiiime and it really got him down. 

What you need to do is sit her down and go, “Girl, I can't understand it; why you want to hurt me, after all the things I've done for you. I buy you champagne and roses and diamonds on your finger. Diamonds on your finger. Still, you hang out all night. What am I to do?” And then, if she can’t give you a straight answer and won’t spend a few nights in, I’d suggest you set your sights on someone else. 

Because, although it might seem like she just wants to go out, she might just be trying to mack on other dudes. That’s what happened to Eddie. As it turns out, he had totally seen his girl in clubs just hangin’ out and dancing. She gave her number to every man she saw. She never came home at night ‘cause she was out romancin’, but even so, he still wished she’d bring some of her love home to him, but she just wouldn’t, because his girl just wanted to party all the time. 

But don’t feel bad about it, I mean, it totally happened to Eddie Murphy, and this was back when he was funny.

Question: 

When I get blackout drunk, do I ask what I did or do I just let it slide?

 Answer:

I want to say that you should just let it slide, but I want you to know that that’s not what I do. In fact, I can’t. It’s just not in my nature. The day after a night of reckless abandon turns me right into the “Sherlock Holmes” of partying. If even a tiny bit of last night slips from my brain, I’ll spend the whole next morning (read: late afternoon) sitting in bed having rapid-fire panic attacks, pulling leaves out of my hair and text messaging everyone in my phonebook to find out why my knuckles are bruised and I’m wearing someone else’s socks. 

I wish that I could find a way to be at peace with whatever I did to not care what it was, but I’m just not that way. But man, if you’re lucky enough to have magical moving-on powers and are able to avoid asking anyone about last night, I’d say that you should. That way you won’t be all embarrassed if you did something stupid.

But really, the best argument for not asking is that time far down the road where someone mentions that one night you told a guy he looked like Mr. Peanut and licked someone’s eyeball and you get to be all surprised and laugh about it. It’s like finding an Easter egg in August. I love candy.

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Last Updated ( Tuesday, 18 November 2008 11:55 )
 
Language not just about vocabulary but culture PDF Print E-mail
Written by Brandon Bishop   
Tuesday, 18 November 2008 09:47

Learning any language is a difficult task, especially when the culture is very different from your own.

When we speak in English or any other Western-European language, we have a shared background that gives us words and phrases that, while having no literal meaning on their own, have a meaning from allusions to history, literature and traditions. For English, many of these words and phrases come from Greek and Roman history, the Bible and Shakespeare.

For many Western-European languages, such words and phrases are frequently drawn from biblical and historical sources, which allow us to generally understand their meaning. For other languages, like Arabic, Chinese and Japanese, such words and phrases are drawn from sources very different from the West.

For these non-European languages, it’s necessary to not only learn the vocabulary and grammar of the language, but also to learn more about the history and culture that created the language. As a student of Chinese, I’m most familiar with a group of sayings referred to as “chengyu,” or Chinese idioms, which contain a great deal of cultural and historical information.

These idioms are usually four word phrases that are used as shorthand to refer to a feeling or opinion based on historical or literary sources. They are commonly found both in written and spoken Chinese. While it is possible to learn Chinese without studying these idioms, most students of Chinese find that learning some of the more common idioms is helpful to understanding the language and culture.

As an example of how much meaning these idioms may contain, let’s look at one that comes from “Confucius’s Analects:” “Learning three things by asking one question.” This idiom refers to a story in “Analects” where one of Confucius’ students asks Confucius’ son if he has received any special treatment from their teacher. Confucius’ son explains that he has not and reminds the student of the value of two important books. The student then says that by asking one question he has learned three things, the value of the two books and that Confucius is a man of good character who does not provide his son any special advantage over his students. Over time the phrase “learning three things by asking one question” came to mean obtaining more than what was originally expected, similar to our own idiom “killing two birds with one stone.”

While many idioms like the one above are fairly obvious, some of them have changed over the centuries to be the opposite of their literal meaning. Other idioms, like “painting a snake with feet,” have meanings that are not obvious and refer to events from literature or history that we in the West are unfamiliar with.

While most native Chinese speakers will avoid using idioms when speaking with foreigners learning their language, understanding and using these idioms is an important step to being able to read Chinese literature and follow Chinese language media. Aside from this, understanding idioms allows a Chinese language student to begin to understand more about Chinese culture, an important part of becoming fluent. 

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America’s Disease: It’s Cheap and Affordable PDF Print E-mail
Written by Matt Willford   
Friday, 14 November 2008 09:30

If you haven’t heard yet, we are host to the world’s fattest citizens. This happens to be a title that is great to have over other countries. Screw the Olympics; I’d rather see how fast I can eat sticks of butter. What really cracks me up about the obesity epidemic is it is considered a disease. There are too many things that get lumped in with diseases and obesity is one of them. Obesity has eaten its way onto the disease list and I don’t like it. It’s the only disease I know that can be cured with a banana and a treadmill. 

Now let’s try to examine what is at the heart of this particular “disease.” Individuals that are currently obese just can’t afford to lose the weight. It is way too costly, especially at a time when the economy is rolling down the gutter. When individuals lose weight, they have to buy clothes for every stage of weight loss. If you only go down a size it might not be too bad, but some pennies will still have to be pinched. However, what about the people who have to shed, say, a whole person? There’s a few different stages you have to buy clothes for, and people just can’t afford that. 

Trying to eat right is also detrimental to the dieter’s budget. It costs less to get food that contains partial amounts of foods that are on the pyramid than to buy the actual real food. Buying foods that fill the void and keep you from starving is economical, but trying to be a health fanatic: that’s just insanity. We can’t all try to achieve the Hollywood look. Plus, donuts taste way better than vegetables. 

In order to try to keep the disease away you have to own a gym membership. That’s just the way things are, if you think you can just run and walk all around town for free, you’re just un-American. There’s Communism written all over that “method” of staying healthy and it needs to stop. The days of working out to Richard Simmons videos with cans of soup in each hand while prancing around the living room of your doublewide are unfortunately over. 

These diseased individuals have to go through the ridicule of waiting for the next available weight machine, in front of all the gym fanatics that talk too much about how they felt on the last set and how they felt on their set last month. But why sacrifice being able to put that down payment on your dream house so you can afford that wallet-draining gym membership? I say welcome the disease; it’s cheaper, plus donuts taste better than vegetables. 

Putting the costliness of weight loss aside, I can’t stand people that have just lost a bunch of weight. They are always expecting a compliment. Especially if I see these people at some dinner party around a bunch of the former fatty’s friends. Their friends are nudging me to go compliment them on the loss. Then the moment comes that the former obese person approaches me and asks me what I think of the weight loss. Usually a lie pops out just to shut them up. But what is really going on in my head is, “Well I kind of liked you better when you were fat. You didn’t talk so much and you didn’t bother me with questions.” These people expect more attention because their appearance might be slightly better. Why not stay fat and less attention-happy? Plus those donuts taste way better than vegetables. 

 
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